"To Love And Cherish" Part 2

Who is in control? Who makes the rules? Who's the boss? What should be asked is, what does God want for my family? What is the biblical role of the husband? How do I become the spiritual leader of my home?
Eph 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
Eph 5:23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
Eph 5:24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Eph 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
Eph 5:26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Eph 5:27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
Wives submit does not mean your the "master", it means that God has designed marriage to work a specific way. Verse 25 does not say for husbands to be "in charge" of their wives, It says to love them. To love them as Christ loved, you will be leading your family, not lording over your family. Men all to often see this as a license to be the boss, and if that's your attitude, your not fit to lead an ox cart. God in no way intended men to be "Masters" and women to be "Servants". He intended for men to follow Christs example, and to lead through love and service. How many husbands out there have washed their wife's feet? Probably not many, but Christ washed his disciples feet, if we are to be Christ for our wife, then we must lead through constant service. You are to be the head of your house, but do you have to tell your wife that? If you do your not leading, you are trying to assume a role that doesn't belong to you. How effective would a boss on the job be if every time he told you to do something he had to say, "I'm the boss and you have to listen to me." No, a good leader will lead and everyone will know it. And as for verse 22, men don't need worry about that. You will have enough to do following what God expects from you. These verses are not dependant on one another, (Eph.5:22&5:25) they are individual commands. A man has no right to say, " if she was more submissive, then I would be a better leader," just the same, a woman has no right to say,"if he was a better husband, I would be more submissive." If a wife doesn't submit to her husband, she is not disobeying him, she's disobeying God. A man who doesn't love and lead his family is letting God down, not his wife. We have a job to do as husband and it doesnt matter what our present situation is, you are to love your wife as Christ did, and be a man, be a leader. Most women are waiting for a man to take charge but when you fail to, they feel obligated to pick up the slack. Then before you know it, you are in no more a position of authority on your home than one of your kids. That's not fair to your wife, she was created to be your "help meet"(Genesis 2:20-24) , you should allow her to be that, and not feel she needs to be your mother. You need to lead, and if she doesn't follow, continue to lead until you have earned her trust and respect, and when she falls behind, go back and pick her up and lead on. I'll bet there are plenty of women out there who would tell their husbands to "lead, follow, or get out of the way". Which one are you going to do?